Selfhelp Question & Answer: Thoughts, Feelings, Soul Choice

Selfhelp Question & Answer: Thoughts, Feelings, Soul Choice

Hello,

I posted the following earlier over at the Holistic Healing Forum at About.com and thought I'd share it here:

If the 'box' I choose to live within, to create my daily reality every day, is the 'box'/belief/knowingness/acceptance that I am a powerful creator linked to the Allness of Life and that as an expression of Life, I, today, this minute, get to choose that I am the ONLY creator in my life.... Then so it is. Living ensconced in that in my NOW moments of daily living, NO person, entity, thing,,, whateverrrrrrrrr, can affect me. The key shot is "LIVING ENSCONCED". If I intend/create that box/attitude/belief/way of Being in one moment, then in the next moment, happily waste my Life energy on the phone chatting to my friend blaming ANY person or thing for something I'm experiencing in my life, I have in THAT moment, stepped out of being "ENSCONCED" in my awareness of being the only creator in my life to opening and allowing the possibility and therefore the reality of someone else, something else 'out there' being a CAUSE of something in my life. IF I'm the Creator in my Life, I AM the only Cause in my Life. I either accept this or not. If I accept this, then I HAVE to LIVE by it. Or it won't BE the reality in my Life. EVERY thought I have.... and KEEP entertaining, creates my reality. EVERY feeling I have, that I do NOT explore, then choose if I want to keep on HAVING, and KEEP entertaining, creates my reality. EVERY unexplored attitude I have..... and KEEP entertaining, creates my reality. EVERY intent I have, every one, creates my reality. My days are therefore busy Being aware of what thoughts, feelings, attitudes and intents are playing within me and choosing which ones stay and which ones go. I GET to say. I GET to Choose. It's MY life. It's MY Life Energy. I AM the ONLY one who can direct it, control it, or allow it to be controlled, directed by someone, something else, by the Choice that it be so. HOW do I know if I've given my power away? How do I know if I've given permission for someone else, something else to 'control/affect' my life? I single-mindedly become aware and monitor the thoughts, feelings, attitudes and intentions I have in each moment, each day. I'm alive today. I'm thinking, I'm feeling, I'm creating my life with those thoughts and feelings. Why would I NOT want to monitor and direct my thought/feeling Life Energy unless I've given up on the idea of Being free, independent, happy, living a complete and fully self-expressed life? If I need money today and I open and do whatever I do that makes me feel that the forces of Life Itself will help me to make/get some money today, and STICK to that KNOWINGNESS and ACCEPTANCE that Life supports me and my desires without ANY limitation whatsoever, money MUST come into my experience. A personal example: I've been imagining $100 coming into my PayPal account every day. I do this by closing eyes, 'seeing' my PayPal back office and the balance amount being $100. I kept doing this for several times a day. Feeling ecstactic as I imagined opening my PayPal account and seeing $100. The very next day I got money into my account. And the next. I noticed that I started questioning within myself if Life would realise that what I wanted was a new amount of $100 EVERY day. Yes, I was thankful for what was coming in but rather than dance and keep imagining $100 several times a day, every day, to explore what I and Life would create in this new game, I started sabotaging the whole thing. So I said, OK, let me start to imagine $500 in my PayPal account. Then I explored my account, saw my monthly withdrawal limit was $2,500, then thought: 'GREAT, let me start imagining $2,500'. Guess what???? I stopped getting money into my account every day. It's fine to go for more... but if I am serious about creating a certain amount of additional money in my PayPal account everyday and not just playing with the idea of Being a Creator in my life, then I MUST choose, decide, then establish a strong, unshakeable focus that Life can use as a template to back up my chosen desire. If I go to Life one day with a cup, then the next moment, I go with a pail, then the next, I'm visiting Life with a barrel, how in Life's name is Life supposed to KNOW what I want????? Whatever it is I choose to establish and maintain in my life, I must become single-mindedly focused on achieving it. PERIOD. Full Stop. END of story. If I'm not just playing or entertaining myself to combat boredom etc, If I'm deadly serious about creating what I want in my life, then I MUST step up to the plate and BE vigilant in owning my power to create what I want and discipline my self, my thoughts, my feelings, my fears, my anxieties, my ........ everything........ and be committed to what I'm choosing to create. In this commitment, EVERYTHING will happen to test my resolve as a Creator in my Life. My thoughts will run amok. My feelings will heave with volcanic eruptions. My fears will all surface, smother and want to bury me. My response as a Loving, Resolved Creator of my Life? I speak to my thoughts, the same way I speak with my children who are doing/thinking/being in ways that will not support their growing into free, independent, responsible, conscious creators of their lives: I speak to my thoughts: "Hello, thought of despair in Angela. How are you today? Why are you thinking that I can't create $500 in my PayPal account instead of $100? Am I not worthy of receving $500? Every day? Listen.... Listen..... Listen.... and Speak with each thought as it comes up. I BE with my volcanic feelings. For yearssss, every day, manyyyyyy times a day, I locked my bedroom door, turned up either the radio or tv loud, and proceeded to let every imaginable emotion RIP. I screamed into my pillow, cursed into my pillow.... completely submitted and experienced and rode the wave of every emotion that rose within me. I stayed with each and every one, sometimes feeling I could not live PAST the current one, until it subsided, rested, resumed, crested, subsided, rested..... Attitude? I catch it as quickly as I can. When I'm being in my ego. When I'm being non-chalant. When I'm being anything other than the powerful, loving, wise Creator of my Life that I Am. Goddess, this is LONG. I'll pause now. Angela.

You can view the whole thread here.

Love and take very good care until next time.



Angela.


Angela Chen Shui:
Soul Self Help
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Selfhelp Question & Answer: Thoughts, Feelings, Soul Choice